

Darker Than It Has Any Right To Be.
5-Gallon All-Grain Homebrew Recipe
THE CHARACTER
Alfie Potts has never broken a story that the Hearthcombe Stag & Standard™ didn't print first. He will tell you this is irrelevant. The Stag & Standard, he will explain at considerable length, prints facts. The Thornwick Badger prints truth. These are not the same thing, and if you can't see the difference, you probably subscribe to the wrong paper.
Thirty-one years old, born three streets from the Duffy & Ward Social House, Alfie has never once seriously considered leaving the valley — though he will tell you he has been offered positions in London. He has not been offered positions in London.
He is the sole owner, editor, reporter, typesetter, and delivery boy of the Thornwick Badger, established 1894 by people who found the Stag & Standard insufferable, a tradition Alfie upholds with genuine devotion and absolutely no self-awareness. His masthead tagline — "Tomorrow's News, Today" — is the greatest piece of unintentional self-ownership in the history of Cotswolds publishing. Every soul in the valley knows the Badger is yesterday's news tomorrow. Alfie knows they say it. It bothers him considerably more than he lets on.
He is sweet on Sloane Duffy the way weather is sweet on the Cotswolds — constantly, hopelessly, and without any realistic expectation of improvement. His articles about her are noticeably more florid than his other work. The Commodore has noticed. Charlie Watts has definitely noticed. Sloane herself finds it either amusing or mildly irritating depending on the day and the quality of the prose.
THE STYLE
Oatmeal Stout is a traditional English variant of sweet stout, distinguished by the addition of up to 20% flaked oats in the grain bill. The oats add complex proteins, lipids, and beta-glucans that profoundly alter the texture of the beer, creating a silky, creamy mouthfeel and a dense, persistent head. Unlike a dry Irish stout, which finishes with a sharp, roasted astringency, an Oatmeal Stout is rounded, nutty, and subtly sweet, with a flavor profile leaning toward milk chocolate and fresh-roasted coffee with cream.
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